Brown Belt Blues

When I was an under belt, under green with stripe (3rd kyu), a new belt rank meant a new kata or two and  a slight increase in fitness. Yea, we did fight training every week. But belt tests focused on kihon and katas and as long as you sparred just once, you passed.

At 3rd kyu however, it seemed like there was a lot more on my shoulders on my journey to 2nd kyu, brown belt. The katas I had to learn, three of them, were all similar, were confusing me. As an upper belt the things I thought I was doing correctly, were now getting nit-picked. Okay nit-picked is a bad word, maybe tweaked is a better word, but it sure did feel like nit-picked. Seemed like all the pinan katas were running together and would often start a san kata and finish with a yon somewhere in the middle. Also trying to train for a fight so I could be eligible for the Japan fights next year. The worst thing was when testing for my brown belt, for the end of the kihon and katas, I was in front of everyone doing them by myself.

Things are even harder for me as a brown belt. Sensei tells me that this is the level that they lose people at. This is where it really gets tough. I agree. I feel the frustration. I am being corrected, but instead of just saying what I am doing wrong, I am told that I should know better at my rank. I am told that I am now a leader as a brown belt. People are looking up to me to show them how to do things correctly. No pressure or anything.

Shihan is already asked me about the next belt test and weather or not Ill be ready for it. Brings my anxiety level up but if I am not working towards something, I am simply existing. I don't want to just exist so somehow I have to push through this. I have to pull it together and get the new katas learned, perfect my stances, use proper fighting techniques and be able to teach.

Anatomy of a Brown Belt Test

When I was at my first test, I 'knew' I couldn't do my requirements. The basic fitness everyone has to do. I had the hardest time with push ups and sit ups. I was so worried about not passing. Little did I know then that if you are invited to test, you have already shown that you have what is required to pass the test. The brown belt test is no different in the fact that if you are invited, you already passed. You still have to work hard for it, but Shihan knows that you have what it takes. He doesn't like setting people up for failure.

Belt Test ~ Green Looks Good On Me

Belt Test
Shortcomings
The belt test has come and gone and it was fun. "Grades" came in and well I could have done better. I earned my belt, but there are some short falls. I need to work on push ups. I have to complete them without a break. I also, sadly, got my first 'fail', for my handstand. I have to do one for 60 seconds. Usually I am told to try harder next time but get scored on the effort. This time, I got a big fat, "fail" written on my paper.

Belt Test Tonight!

Last Sunday, I went to Sensei's dojo for class in Bethel. She has several white belt's in her class now and all five of them are testing this Friday (tonight). Their first test. I know how nervous they must be. I know how nervous I was when I took my test.

I 'knew' I was going to fail. I couldn't do the pushups and situps required. I was very knit-picky on my only kata I had to do. Were my strikes are sharp as they needed to be? Was my stance correct? Then I was worried that I wouldn't remember kihon and would forget to pivot when I kicked.

Anatomy of a Black Belt Test

I am still a long way from my black belt.I would be six months closer, but I have been skipping belt tests. I have a lot of anxiety about the black belt test. It is a big deal. So I thought if I watched the test, it would help me be not so nervous about it.

Belt Test - Felling a Little Yellow

It has been a rough few days here in the Northeast. The temperature has been soaring in the upper 90's Schools in Maine have cancelled their after school sports and some have even closed all together.

Wednesday's kata class was surprisingly full. Usually when it is hot like that, people will stay home. I think some wanted to make sure that they got their hours in before the belt test. We did the usual kihon, then fitness. We lined up for kata, and went through just a few of them when Shihan stopped us. Some of us didn't look healthy, me included, I am sure. So we stopped and just worked on self defense.